This video reminds me of the Ghostbusters line: “Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together… mass hysteria!” Except this time there’s a side of Chicken McNuggets.
Thanks for Cute Overload for this one. And thanks to the New York Times for some not-cute-at-all moments. They should have renamed this Sunday’s Styles section the “Boys Who Will Need Serious Psychotherapy Sooner Rather Than Later” section. Cringe at the following:
- Simon Woods, the six-year-old who can’t join a baseball team because his greenorexic mother refuses to raise the family’s carbon footprint by driving him to games;
- Jonathan, writer Christopher Buckley’s unwanted, out-of-wedlock son;
- Sarvis, the nine-year-old son of embarrassing and possibly incestuous Kate Krautkramer. Kate is ready to cut whichever little girl dared to write “I heart Sarvis” in a bathroom stall because NO ONE CAN LOVE HER SON AS MUCH AS SHE DOES, BITCH!!!! Yeah, I think I read this book before. (UPDATED TO NOTE: I thought this essay was a joke at first but the fact that it wasn’t at all funny convinced me otherwise.)
UPDATED AGAIN TO ADD: I would totally love to take credit for “greenorexic” but sadly, LBR, I didn’t make it up. I must say I have been meeting more and more people with greenorexic tendencies, and I fear it will catch up with orthorexia in popularity. I really think when you’re not able to live a normal life anymore, it doesn’t matter if you’re telling yourself that you’re doing it for good health or to save the planet — those of us who are in touch with reality are going to see through to the craziness that’s really driving you. Speaking of insanity, I have to share this comment from a friend who emailed me after she read this post:
“I’ve came across many crazies (of various degrees) in Vermont. Only one couple lived in isolation, with an outdoor toilet, their own food, buying nothing etc. He used to be Nixon’s speechwriter and sometime concert pianist, she was a writer. He ended up going into the woods to die (with letters, goodbyes etc). They found him frozen one morning.”
Is it bad that the “Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer” skit from Saturday Night Live sprang immediately to my mind?