A few months ago, someone submitted a comment to this blog accusing me of being a “wrinkly slut.” My first reaction was to say, “Mom, that’s the pot calling the kettle black!” I kid, I kid. My mother is smooth and chaste. In reality, my first reaction was to say, “‘Wrinkly Slut’ would be a great name for a cocktail!”
Since then, we — and by “we,” I mean “my gorgeous friend Tina, working entirely by herself” — have slaved over the recipe for the Wrinkly Slut. One effort included cranberries, but Tina’s final creation is a spicy margarita. Behold!
The Wrinkly Slut is garnished with a Thai chili pepper and a slice of jalapeno. I’m going to let Tina announce the recipe to the world since she deserves the credit, but I assure you it’s very tasty. I also assure you that I’m not as inebriated as I might appear in this photo.
I swear on my chaste mother that I only look bleary-eyed because I was laughing so hard at a Bethany-Kelly conversation on The Real Housewives of New York City. Anyway, I think Tina should do a whole line of Slut cocktails. I think there would be a lot of demand for the “Ignorant Slut.”
UPDATED TO ADD: I apologize to the people outside the U.S. who can’t see the Saturday Night Live clip from Hulu. It was the best I could do, because the toothless whores at NBC hunt down and delete any SNL clips that appear on YouTube.
This may very well be the best name for a cocktail. EVER.
Once I get the recipe, I will proudly drink one (several) in your honor.
-Another Wrinkly Slut
You left a comment on a post I made last fall, and I’m such a ditz, I don’t think I responded to you! I’m so sorry! The post was about a bunch off silly Japanese candies and stuff I was auctioning off to benefit Nie Nie. http://wordmagix.blogspot.com/2008/09/silent-auction-of-japanese-sweetness.html
ANYway…I love sharing bits and pieces of this marvelous country with others, and you were kind enough to comment…and I believe in spreading joy…so, after far too many ellipses (ellipsisises?) I’d like to offer to send you a little package of Japanese “cuteness” (for free). Please contact me at carolie(AT)wordmagix(DOT)com.
Hahaha… brilliant name for a cocktail!!
Sharon Rose says
Hi there-I think you could be inspiring a glut of slut cocktails, this one looks fabulous!
Lol oh geez, I think I remember you mentioning that comment to me! This sounds like a cocktail I’m going to have to try.
And boo, Hulu has detected my very Canadian IP and given me its polite version of the “Bugger off, you’re not American and can’t watch this video” message.
What a great way to make lemonade out of a lemon, so to speak.
petite and dynamite says
love the wrinkly slut. and by the way, team Bethany all the way.. but the best is Jill’s response to the food suggestions for her event.
Fabulous. I love how you made lemonade out of lemons.
Your blog never fails to make me laugh. It is an amazing name for a cocktail.
esme and the lane way says
haha cool, that cocktail sounds awesome! Hooray for hilarious inspiration 😀
Shrimpton Couture says
I will so drink up one of those with you too!! Sometimes I get so sick of mean people on the web. This is a great payback. Turns a diss into a drink.
Swell Vintage - Frankie says
This is brilliant!
Also, how can you be labelled a “wrinkly slut” when you have no wrinkles?!
Deja Pseu says
Love it!!! Ignorant Slut for sure, then something with British gin and call it the Cheeky Tart?
Ha ha ha! I had a drink called a “Dirty Ho” not long ago, but “Wrinkly Slut” is better.
I’ll admit that I never miss the Real Housewives.
Oh sweetie – who could write that about you? You’re not wrinkly at all. 😉
You are a delight!!!! This post made my morning. 🙂
BTW – I’ve seen that Bethenny-Kelly convo way too many times and I have to watch Kelly’s part through my fingers – can you say wack job?
Shannon (Aesthettes Anon) says
I am so looking forward to updates on the slut line of cocktails now 🙂
Also, jealous much? I wish I looked like you now, let alone when I am your age!
You and your friends ought to start a think tank.
And open a bar.
i’ve seen you up close in daylight. if you’re a wrinkly slut, i aspire to be just as wrinkly a slut as you.
Best SNL skit ever, and great cocktail name. On a sidenote, “you ignorant slut” is a pet name my mom has for me. ha. talk about full-circle.
Ohhhh! I love the idea of a whole line of slutty cocktails. I’m on it!
The Vegetable Assassin says
I think I must have that margarita! It sounds delicious and naughty.
And someone called you a wrinkly slut? As a joke surely? Either that or they’re blind and stupid, which is always a possibility.
And stupid Hulu won’t let me watch the video. How dare I be outside the U.S.? Hulu is a wrinkly slut.
fashion herald says
mmmm, yummy! I know when I was a wrinkly slut I drank lots of margaritas. (still laughing over “mom” line!)
Are you fucking serious?! Why would anyone be so fucking mean? For what purpose??
At least you got some mileage out of it! (Most exclamation points I think I’ve ever used) I can’t wait to get the recipe. There is a margarita at one of my favorite restaurants called a Chile Rita. Not only do I get swooningly drunk…my mouth shoots flames too! I love savory drinks.
Signed…The Botoxed Slut!
Belle de Ville says
Wendy….you crack me up.
CLEARLY, the best reaction to a troll comment EVER.
haha Wendy you’re awesome
You can’t see me, but I am standing and applauding right now!!
Well done Wendy!
pretty face says
Haha, it’s hard to believe that you are in any way chaste or *un*drunk when you talk about naming cocktails wrinkly and ignorant sluts.
But whatevs the cocktail looks gorgeous and so do you 😉 x
Savvy Mode SG says
But I have to say whoever called you wrinkled is blind.
Just further evidence that my invention should be granted a patent – the Robot Laser Screener: when you enter a comment so fucking stupid it boggles the mind, you get your ass shot up. With lasers. By robots.
I can’t believe someone would ever say that about you Wendy!!
You are right though it’s such a perfect name for a cocktail. They look yummy!
Thats to funny! You look great.
the iron chic says
Wrinkly slut?! That is the kind of comment I pray to Baby Jesus for every night. Lucky Devil!
Awesome drink name. I’m always thinking up fun band names. This could work in that context too! And I love the ingredients. What better for a wrinkly slut than tequila and spice. LOVE it.
Looking delightfully unlined in the photo, btw 🙂
Dream Sequins says
Damn. Jealousy. It causes people to say some ugly things! Love you and your blog. FYI, I can’t believe Real Housewives is already over! It was nice to see Simon and Ramona getting down on the dancefloor. They need to do more dance offs to ease the tension. Haha. And the Wrinkly Slut cocktail looks amazing 🙂
xx-LJ from SOS!
Renée Sturme says
god that looks delicious.
I’ve never been as thirsty as I am now.
You’re such a classy dame. It takes a smart broad to know the only way to deal with a troll is cocktail hour.
And for the record, even though it goes without saying: trolls don’t pick on people who actually fit the epithet. Clearly.
miss cavendish says
Dan Ackroyd’s Canadian accent is so sex-ay.
Nina (femme rationale) says
wth would call you a wrinkly slut? btw, great name for a drink.
and the bethenny vs. kelly “talk” they had at jill’s…oh man. it seemed like they edited 2 completely different convos and made it into one, that’s how off the wave length they were. kelly is whack.
Yum! While you’re at it, sign me up for a “Toothless Whore”.
“‘Wrinkly Slut”?! That is hysterical!
Aren’t insults supposed to make one angry or hurt rather than bring laughter?
They need remedial insults 101.
The garnish for the drink should be the wrinkly head of one of those apple head dolls!
miss sophie says
first off. brilliant comeback at the jerk who dared to hurl such nasty epithets!
second. i also am addicted to RHNY. you should tradmark ‘The Wrinkly Slut’! i can think of thousands of bars in nyc that would love to have it on the menu 😀
Sounds like something that I have been called….
Heh, heh—no, really I was thinking that we should have a cocktail named “Botox Bitch”—dedicated to all those housewifes from LA!!
By the by—-hate Kelly—love Bethany….
way to get that nasty commenter back!! 🙂
Thumbelina Fashionista says
That person obviously has no class.
You, on the other hand, are HILARITY personified. That looks yummy…
Imelda Matt - The Despotic Queen of Shoes says
Down under it’s likely to be translated into ‘wrinkly effing mole’ and that’s not something that I’d be inclined to drink.