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Thank You, Levi Johnston’s Penis!

September 3, 2008 by WendyB

Yesterday, this blog got its highest traffic ever thanks to people searching for the kid who sperminated Sarah Palin’s daughter.

Levi Johnston, baby daddy

Maybe I’ll get lucky and he’ll knock up some other chick soon. It bet he will because he has the Kevin Federline vibe. He’s totally got the magic hillbilly sperm. All he has to do is walk by you and you get pregnant! Levi Johnston is going to have more kids than Brangelina by the time he’s 20.

I know there are some people who feel like politicians’ families should be totally off-limits for public discussion. I would agree except the politicians are so damned determined to flaunt their families and family values whenever it suits them. Personally, I think it’s peculiar that — only in politics — it is considered appropriate to have your spouse speak for you on what is essentially a job interview.

Michelle Obama gave a convention speech

WTF? I don’t bring MrB along every time I meet with a store, magazine or client! I doubt y’all bring your mom or dad with you when you’re interviewing for that great new job, right? Even actors don’t bring along their hot spouses du jour whenever they go for a screen test. So I’d suggest to politicians that they start leaving their families at home instead of shoving them in our faces, especially when they know that the family’s abstinence program was a complete failure and that their daughter is knocked up by some teen himbo with magic sperm.

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Filed Under: Celebrities, In the News, insanity

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Seraphine says

    September 3, 2008 at 11:07 am

    i never listened to my parents at that age either, especially when it came to friends and relationships.
    but heyyy. people frequently take spouses and family members to interviews, except most call them agents. example: dina lohan.

  2. WendyB says

    September 3, 2008 at 11:09 am

    Ha! True, there is the phenomenon of the “momager” but those are often insane people who are pimping out their underage kids to live out their own frustrated dreams. Yuck.

  3. La Belette Rouge says

    September 3, 2008 at 11:16 am

    It is shocking that politicians would ever talk out both sides of their mouths ;-)—i.e., “this is a family issue and not a political one” and then bring the whole family to the convention–including the hockey jockey with the magic sperm—for a heartwarming family portrait.

  4. lisa says

    September 3, 2008 at 11:20 am

    This post was too funny.

  5. (R)evolver74 says

    September 3, 2008 at 11:21 am

    Himbo..hahaha…

  6. The Clothes Horse says

    September 3, 2008 at 12:38 pm

    I don’t think that family should be off-limits, but I really like your comparison with a job interview, at some point what is going on with the family DOESN’T MATTER.

  7. Kira Fashion says

    September 3, 2008 at 1:05 pm

    LOve Michelle Obama!

    a kiss!!!!

  8. Skye says

    September 3, 2008 at 1:42 pm

    “Teen Himbo with Magic Sperm” would make a great t-shirt slogan. Had me laughing anyway!

    Over here politicians families are rarely seen – the prime minister’s family/wife are, but I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen the wife of the opposition leader.

  9. stef m says

    September 3, 2008 at 2:42 pm

    i am desperate for the coen brothers to make a movie about this

  10. Savvy Mode SG says

    September 3, 2008 at 2:43 pm

    well, if they don’t bring their families then how r they going to show off what a great person, dad, husband, wife, mother etc he or she is…. you have a great point about the job interview though.

  11. styleraven says

    September 3, 2008 at 3:07 pm

    I think I should thank you for your leftovers. For some odd reason, I got a spike in hits. WordPress stats suck so I’m not sure where they’re coming from. Maybe they clicked my name in my last commnet to your blog.

    And thank God politician families are mostly out of sight here (minus Trudeaus).

  12. Emily says

    September 3, 2008 at 3:43 pm

    ha, i certainly see your point…but in the case of michelle obama, i am quite glad that she got the chance to speak. i was absolutely floored by her poise, intelligence and character.

  13. Suze says

    September 3, 2008 at 4:07 pm

    So you’re saying leave pepaw and memaw at home during my next interview?

  14. Oh Lady E says

    September 3, 2008 at 4:14 pm

    HAHA. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

    That made me feel so much better.

  15. TheSundayBest says

    September 3, 2008 at 4:18 pm

    The worst thing I’ve seen online today, and that’s saying something, is a blog “written” by Sarah Palin’s daughter, who I take it has down’s syndrome. I’m not going to provide a link. Suffice it to say, the author will one day burn in whatever hell there is.

    But I agree with you about politician’s and their family flaunting. An ad for Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper features a bunch of REAL CANADIANS talking about what they like about him. One of those things – that he likes the idea of family. Uh what? The idea of family? Family isn’t an idea. It’s a thing. He has one. Hurray for his sperm.

  16. roller coaster teacher says

    September 3, 2008 at 4:35 pm

    (No, thesundaybest, it’s the baby boy born in April that has Down’s, not either of the Palin girls.)

    BAM! That’s the sound of Wendy hitting the mark spot on.

  17. enc says

    September 3, 2008 at 5:26 pm

    Thank you.

  18. Practically Perfect In Every Way says

    September 3, 2008 at 5:30 pm

    sing it sister!

  19. Emily says

    September 3, 2008 at 5:59 pm

    Ick. He really should have [kept his pants on.]

  20. K.Line says

    September 3, 2008 at 6:01 pm

    I have frequently wondered about this. Why the fuck do I care if Michelle thinks her husband is worthy of the job of president? (The cynical me says he’ll be as inclined to have a power-driven affair as all the other politicians lately and we’ll be watching her stiff upper lip it in a couple of years.) I don’t vote for my political leaders on the basis of his or her function as spouse. It concerns me that some people actually do.

  21. KD says

    September 3, 2008 at 6:07 pm

    Oooops! I just left a comment as “Emily” accidentally, on this post and the last one! It’s actually KD.

  22. Dr Zibbs says

    September 3, 2008 at 6:45 pm

    That dummy doesn’t look like as big of a dummy as the dummy is.

  23. copperoranges says

    September 3, 2008 at 7:38 pm

    you look elegant as hell in those wedding pictures!

    i never thought of the convention as a job interview … i thought of it more as a coming out party? lol.

  24. AsianCajuns says

    September 3, 2008 at 7:48 pm

    Ugh. Bleh. He’s horrible for so many reasons. And to add insult to injury he has a mullet!

  25. Anjeanette says

    September 3, 2008 at 7:59 pm

    I agree….but anything that creates scandal for the Republican party is fine by me!

  26. Renaissance Woman says

    September 3, 2008 at 8:16 pm

    Well said…well said!

  27. Lavender says

    September 4, 2008 at 2:04 am

    he he. ‘Hillbilly sperm’. I love it. Why is it the ladies can’t resist?
    Thanks for the tag.

  28. Step Right Up says

    September 4, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    How can a politician say “families should be off limits” when he has his wife speaking on his behalf? If you want your wife to speak or she wants to speak in a public forum, then she should be able to handle the criticism of what she has said or written.

  29. Alya says

    September 4, 2008 at 5:51 pm

    “Personally, I think it’s peculiar that — only in politics — it is considered appropriate to have your spouse speak for you on what is essentially a job interview”

    This quote should be made famous!! LOL. I LOVE IT!

  30. fashion herald says

    September 4, 2008 at 10:07 pm

    Seriously well argued. Because the spouses are essentially warming up the crowd; isn’t that a better job for a best friend/advisor?

  31. Iheartfashion says

    September 5, 2008 at 9:07 am

    Good point. I just ranted away about this today.

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MEET WENDY BRANDES

Award-winning designer of fine jewelry inspired by women's history and pop culture. A former journalist who writes about jewelry, fashion, medieval history, news, feminism, dogs, cats and whatever else is on her mind. Blogging since 2007.
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