{"id":3193,"date":"2009-12-12T15:03:54","date_gmt":"2009-12-12T20:03:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wendybrandes.com\/blog\/?p=3193"},"modified":"2013-08-21T18:47:34","modified_gmt":"2013-08-21T22:47:34","slug":"why-dont-you-choke-on-a-fashion-accessory","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/2009\/12\/why-dont-you-choke-on-a-fashion-accessory\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Don&#8217;t You Choke on a Fashion Accessory?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>There is only one day left to vote for me in the &#8220;prestigious&#8221; <a href=\"http:\/\/theofficialsiteofgrantmiller.blogspot.com\/2009\/11\/2009-drysdale-award-nominees.html\" target=\"_blank\">Drysdale Awards<\/a> at <a href=\"http:\/\/theofficialsiteofgrantmiller.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Grant Miller Media<\/a>. (<strong><a href=\"http:\/\/theofficialsiteofgrantmiller.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">UPDATED MONDAY: POLLS ARE CLOSED, BUT READ ON ANYWAY).<\/a><\/strong> I am nominated for <a href=\"http:\/\/theofficialsiteofgrantmiller.blogspot.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Blog With the Most Swearing, Blog That is Clearly Contracted to Endorse a Product or Service, and Blogger of the Year.<\/a> I am dismayed to see that I am losing ground in the swearing category. What the fuck do I have to do to convince you whores to (a) vote from me from every computer\/browser\/iPhone\/BlackBerry that you can find or steal and (b) make all your family, friends and colleagues do the same? I have already shown you how I <a href=\"http:\/\/wendybrandes.com\/blog\/2009\/12\/buy-it-now-wendy-brandes-for-francis-swear-rings\/\" target=\"_blank\">help other people swear more<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Maybe I need to share one of my favorite songs. In 1988, I fell in love with the movie <a href=\"http:\/\/www.imdb.com\/title\/tt0093558\/\" target=\"_blank\">Mondo New York<\/a>, about the downtown art\/club scene. I got the soundtrack (on tape!) and still listen to it. My favorite songs are <a href=\"http:\/\/www.phoebelegere.com\/\" target=\"_blank\">Phoebe Legere<\/a>&#8216;s &#8220;Marilyn Monroe&#8221; &#8230; and <a href=\"http:\/\/www.thevillager.com\/villager_232\/deanjohnson45.html\" target=\"_blank\">Dean <\/a>and the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.myspace.com\/deanandtheweeniesfansite\" target=\"_blank\">Weenies<\/a>&#8216; classic, &#8220;Fuck You.&#8221; Here&#8217;s the Dean and the Weenies clip. Frankly, my sluts,\u00a0 if a 6&#8217;6&#8243; bald man wearing statement earrings and singing, &#8220;Fuck thermonuclear war\/Fuck Mary Tyler Moore&#8221; doesn&#8217;t impress you, I don&#8217;t know what will.<\/p>\n<p><center><object classid=\"clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000\" width=\"425\" height=\"344\" codebase=\"http:\/\/download.macromedia.com\/pub\/shockwave\/cabs\/flash\/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0\"><param name=\"allowFullScreen\" value=\"true\" \/><param name=\"allowscriptaccess\" value=\"always\" \/><param name=\"src\" value=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/ZnMtvuvM_i0&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;\" \/><param name=\"allowfullscreen\" value=\"true\" \/><embed type=\"application\/x-shockwave-flash\" width=\"425\" height=\"344\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/v\/ZnMtvuvM_i0&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;\" allowscriptaccess=\"always\" allowfullscreen=\"true\"><\/embed><\/object><\/center> <\/script><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There is only one day left to vote for me in the &#8220;prestigious&#8221; Drysdale Awards at Grant Miller Media. (UPDATED MONDAY: POLLS ARE CLOSED, BUT READ ON ANYWAY). I am nominated for Blog With the Most Swearing, Blog That is Clearly Contracted to Endorse a Product or Service, and Blogger of the Year. I am&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/2009\/12\/why-dont-you-choke-on-a-fashion-accessory\/\">Read More &raquo;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3283,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[45,86,42,130],"tags":[326,321,325],"class_list":{"0":"post-3193","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-contests","8":"category-movies","9":"category-music","10":"category-swearing","11":"tag-kingdom-of-style","12":"tag-mondo-new-york","13":"tag-wendy-brandes-for-francis-swear-rings","14":"entry"},"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3193","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3193"}],"version-history":[{"count":26,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3193\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22059,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3193\/revisions\/22059"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3283"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3193"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3193"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3193"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}