{"id":31195,"date":"2015-12-27T22:47:56","date_gmt":"2015-12-28T03:47:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wendybrandes.com\/blog\/?p=31195"},"modified":"2016-01-23T20:57:51","modified_gmt":"2016-01-24T01:57:51","slug":"the-road-to-floral-hell-is-paved-with-good-intentions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/2015\/12\/the-road-to-floral-hell-is-paved-with-good-intentions\/","title":{"rendered":"The Road to Floral Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions"},"content":{"rendered":"

For my parents’ 50th anniversary yesterday, I was so excited for them to receive the special bouquet I had sent them.<\/p>\n

\"the_irresistable_bouquet\"

The flowers that were promised.<\/p><\/div>\n

I’ve been laughing uncontrollably at the floral disaster that was actually delivered.<\/p>\n

\"momflowers\"

What. The. Fuck.<\/p><\/div>\n

I stopped laughing long enough to write an email demanding my money back. I’ll use the refund to buy my parents dinner the next time I see them!<\/p>\n

UPDATED TO ADD: My sister and niece were staying with my parents this week so I figured I’d send them flowers too. My niece loves purple so I picked this.<\/p>\n

\"terri\"

So much purple!<\/p><\/div>\n

Here’s what they got.<\/p>\n

\"uglyfuckingflowers\"

Are those wilting already?<\/p><\/div>\n

Why do businesses think they can get away with this shit? I’m coming for you, Flower Delivery Express<\/a>! Sigh. I normally have such good luck with local florists, but it was difficult to find anyone who would deliver my parents’ neighborhood on December 26. Too bad I didn’t find the “Flower Delivery Express \/ Wesley Berry Flowers is A SCAM<\/a><\/span>” page on Facebook till after these things were delivered!<\/p>\n

UPDATED TO ADD: I got my money back! <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

For my parents’ 50th anniversary yesterday, I was so excited for them to receive the special bouquet I had sent them. I’ve been laughing uncontrollably at the floral disaster that was actually delivered. I stopped laughing long enough to write an email demanding my money back. I’ll use the refund to buy my parents dinner…<\/p>\n

Read More »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":31196,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[508],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-31195","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-humor","8":"entry"},"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31195","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=31195"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31195\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":31663,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31195\/revisions\/31663"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/31196"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=31195"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=31195"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.wendybrandes.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=31195"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}